31 minutes ago, JUSTA6 said:

As I am 3 years and change older than my fiancée, I call these "life lessons". She, naturally, hates them  

 

This was in the restroom in one of Taupo's more upmarket eating establishments. 

3 hours ago, Fitzy said:

This was in the restroom in one of Taupo's more upmarket eating establishments. 

Leave a death star?

10 hours ago, Fitzy said:

This was in the restroom in one of Taupo's more upmarket eating establishments. 

Fitzy, how was mavericks ?

Really good - I had a beef burrito and she had a chicken quesadilla (both listed as 'light meals.') Let me tell you, they were both superb and plenty to fill us up. I watched almost every meal that left the kitchen and everything looked superb - brilliant presentation. Your recommendation came through once more.

55 minutes ago, Fitzy said:

Really good - I had a beef burrito and she had a chicken quesadilla (both listed as 'light meals.') Let me tell you, they were both superb and plenty to fill us up. I watched almost every meal that left the kitchen and everything looked superb - brilliant presentation. Your recommendation came through once more.

Well thats great...

i will be having the crispy pork belly AGAIN as it  was the best !..........this is Taupo's brand new place to go, and there is the brand new bowling alley next to it... i am yet to go have a play, but i will when we get time and all that is going on settles.

latest is not good news and the boss will take this pretty hard.

and thats life.

Edited September 15, 20223 yr by 64 kiwi boni

Yeah, right. I can only offer our thoughts and hope that everything eventually works out, as it will.

Festor....Uggg I mean Fitzy. this ones for you. Ringo said, it means something entirely different here!

 

Edited September 15, 20223 yr by JUSTA6

thats Me !!! 

They are hilarious - JustA finds the best funnies.

To be clear for our International viewers, thongs in Australia are flipflops. We refer to your 'thongs' as G strings, I think. I don't really know coz I've never worn one.

Okay - rarely worn one.

Well, just sometimes but it's uncomfortable.

Look - I've got one on now - here's a pic...

Edited September 17, 20223 yr by Fitzy
Forgot something

12 hours ago, Fitzy said:

Look - I've got one on now - here's a pic...

Thought I'd send some Canuckistani humor out to our friends in the Great White North, eh?

                                BANANAS & MILK DUDS

 

Below is an article written by Rick Reilly of Sports Illustrated...He details his experiences when given the opportunity to fly in a F-14 Tomcat…  If you aren't laughing out loud by the time you get to 'Milk Duds', your sense of humor is seriously broken.

This message is for America 's most famous athletes: Someday you may be invited to fly in the back-seat of one of your country's most powerful fighter jets.  Many of you already have.  John Elway, John Stockton, Tiger Woods to name a few. If you get this opportunity, let me urge you, with the greatest sincerity...Move to Guam.  Change your name.  Fake your own death!  Whatever you do, Do Not Go!!!  I know.

The U.S. Navy invited me to try it.  I was thrilled.  I was pumped.  I was toast!  I should've known when they told me my pilot would Be Chip (Biff) King of Fighter Squadron 213 at Naval Air Station Oceana in Virginia Beach.

Whatever you're thinking a Top Gun named Chip (Biff) King looks like, triple it.  He's about six-foot, tan, ice-blue eyes, wavy surfer hair, finger-crippling handshake -- the kind of man who wrestles dyspeptic alligators in his leisure time.  If you see this man, run the other way.  Fast.

Biff King was born to fly.  His father, Jack King, was for years the voice of NASA missions.  ('T-minus 15 seconds and counting'.  Remember?)  Chip would charge neighborhood kids a quarter each to hear his dad.  Jack would wake up from naps surrounded by nine-year-olds waiting for him to say, 'We have lift off'.

Biff was to fly me in an F- 14D Tomcat, a ridiculously powerful $60 million Weapon with nearly 

as much thrust as weight, not unlike Colin Montgomerie.  I was worried about getting airsick, so

 the night before the flight I asked Biff if there was something I should eat the next morning.

Bananas,' he said.

'For the potassium?'  I asked.

'No,' Biff said, 'because they taste about the same coming up as they do going down.'

The next morning, out on the tarmac, I had on my flight suit with my name sewn over the left breast.  (No call sign -- like Crash or Sticky or Lead foot.  But, still, very cool.)  I carried my helmet in the crook of my arm, as Biff had instructed.  If ever in my life I had a chance to nail Nicole Kidman, this was it.A fighter pilot named Psycho gave me a safety briefing and then fastened me into my ejection seat, which, when employed, would 'egress' me out of the plane at such a velocity that I would be immediately knocked unconscious.

Just as I was thinking about aborting the flight, the canopy closed over me, and Biff gave the ground crew a thumbs-up. In minutes we were firing nose up at 600 mph. We leveled out and then canopy-rolled over another F-14.

Those 20 minutes were the rush of my life.  Unfortunately, the ride lasted 80.  It was like being on the roller coaster at Six Flags Over Hell.  Only without rails.  We did barrel rolls, snap rolls, loops, yanks and banks.  We dived, rose and dived again, sometimes with a vertical velocity of 10,000 feet per minute.  We chased another F-14, and it chased us.

We broke the speed of sound.  Sea was sky and sky was sea.  Flying at 200 feet we did 90-degree turns at 550 mph, creating a G force of 6.5, which is to say I felt as if 6.5 times my body weight was smashing against me, thereby approximating life as Mrs. Colin Montgomerie.

 

And I egressed the bananas.And I egressed the pizza from the night before.And the lunch before that.I egressed a box of Milk Duds from the sixth grade.I made Linda Blair look polite.  Because of the G's, I was egressing stuff that never thought would be egressed.

I went through not one airsick bag, but two.

Biff said I passed out.  Twice… I was coated in sweat.  At one point, as we were coming in upside down in a banked curve on a mock bombing target and the G's were flattening me like a tortilla and I was in and out of consciousness, I realized I was the first person in history to throw down.

I used to know 'cool'.  Cool was Elway throwing a touchdown pass, or Norman making a five-iron bite.  But now I really know 'cool'.  Cool is guys like Biff, men with cast-iron stomachs and freon nerves.  I wouldn't go up there again for Derek Jeter's black book, but I'm glad Biff does every day, and for less a year than a rookie reliever makes in a home stand.

A week later, when the spins finally stopped, Biff called.  He said he and the fighters had the perfect call sign for me.  Said he'd send it on a patch for my flight suit.

What is it?  I asked.

'Two Bags.'

"A veteran is someone who at one point in their life, wrote a blank check made payable to The United States of America for any amount, up to and including their life."

 HOME OF THE FREE, BECAUSE OF THE BRAVE

 

mate! i am sooo impressed how you find all of these !!