The Ranting Thread

[valid]

Dear Boyfriend,

I am sorry you are irritated that we never see each other. You are graduated from college and have a 9-5 job and make over 30k a year. I am a full time student who also works full time at Starbucks, 5 nights a week, and barely makes 16k a year. You do not make any effort to visit me at work. I try to visit you during the day since you work at school but alas, this never happens. This is my only option for seeing you since I do not have a (winter) car. You don't want to come to my apartment because I live with my ex, who is also my best friend. You and I have been dating for a year and a half and I have lived with Mark that entire time-- why are you not over it yet? You accuse me of only spending time with Mark. Well, guess what-- WE LIVE TOGETHER. All we do together is eat food and do homework. I apologize that I am boring and am not fulfilling my duties as Girlfriend, but I am beyond stressed out all of the time. You were a student only a few short months ago and thus I would think that you would understand. This is a two way street, brother.

Sincerely,

Very Irritated Girlfriend

PS: I do not appreciate being compared to your ex. If that happens again, さようなら！

PPS: Do you really think your behavior is making me feel any less stressed or want to spend time with you? I don't think so.

[markpetersonii]

...You accuse me of only spending time with Mark...

I SWEAR I DIDN'T KNOW!!!!

[[ChaosweaveR]]

Tell your man to sign up here. I'll rattle him around a bit for ya, since I have a knack for being such a blunt arsehole on the internets.

But seriously, if he's dragging his feet in the relationship, leave him! If there's one thing life has taught me, don't take crap from anyone. EVAR.

I learned the hard way earlier this year (I think the rant is somewhere in this thread, some dark times. ) and stayed around a chick that was the complete opposite of myself, and let her shit attitude rub off on me. I'm so happy I left her, and I'm as happy as could be with my current g/f, Lisa. We just click perfectly, and you know it's working great when the relationship doesn't feel like work, it just happens.

I wish I could divide myself in two, and send a copy your way (I know a select two other gorls that I wish I could do the same for) you seem like a sweet gal, and you've got one helluva personality. He's taking you for granted, and you deserve better. I say ditch him while you still can if he's this much of a nuisance.

[valid]

I SWEAR I DIDN'T KNOW!!!!

' date='Nov 28 2010, 12:12 AM' post='42334']

But seriously, if he's dragging his feet in the relationship, leave him! If there's one thing life has taught me, don't take crap from anyone. EVAR.

We just click perfectly, and you know it's working great when the relationship doesn't feel like work, it just happens.

I wish I could divide myself in two, and send a copy your way (I know a select two other gorls that I wish I could do the same for) you seem like a sweet gal, and you've got one helluva personality. He's taking you for granted, and you deserve better. I say ditch him while you still can if he's this much of a nuisance.

Well, thank you. I appreciate the good words and compliments, and the thought too! It's just really frustrating when you honestly care about someone and to them you begin to feel like an object. I'm beginning to think that I need some time to just be by myself and not have to worry about a significant other-- I haven't had that in a long time (the break between Mark (oops, sorry lol) and Nate wasn't very long) and I feel I could really benefit from it. Stress and life have been getting to me and I don't really think the additional stress of a (slightly dysfunctional) relationship is very beneficial! I would like stress-free existence for awhile, kthxbai.

/rant

PS, my cat is attacking the bottom of my dresser... wtf.

[Ringo64]

Eh I know how you feel, well being a full time student and having a full time job. I work usually 9-10 hour plus days (because I'm on salary lol) and then classes just put me over the top to about 12-13 hours. Then with hw and all I don't really have time for much else.

I've been single for the past 5 months I've been doing this and well it works for getting shit done. As well as I assume no girl would not want me to spend money on her and save it for my Camaro which is what I want

I still have fun, go out on fridays, meet girls and still do all the fun stuff but want to at least want to have time before I go into a relationship.

Well that's what I've been going through, to meet goals you have to sacrifice sadly

[valid]

My major is incredibly time consuming, as I am sure yours is. (Computer stuff, right? Mark is both Computer Information Science AND Web & Digital Media Development, and I know how little free time he has.) I am in art history which is a lot of memorization and research, then a lot of essay writing. I'm in the midst of writing a 30 page paper on Japanese Esoteric Buddhism right now. I am also writing an essay in Japanese right now, but luckily that one is a lot easier. I still kind of want to die a little, lol.

I have definitely been neglecting the boyfriend, and if he wants to stick around that's great, but until I'm not in school anymore, not much is going to change. School is my priority! Well, and my job, because without that I would be homeless! (And I would have a very boring car.)

EDIT: I also just feel like I don't know who I am or what I want anymore and that I'm conforming myself to this relationship. It was a lot of fun a year ago but he wanted a relationship and I didn't, so I just decided "what the hell" and went for it. I thought dating someone a lot different from me would be a good thing (because Mark and I almost were too similar, I think-- then again, who knows) but it has really just proven to be very frustrating in the long run lol. There is only one (er, public) activity that we enjoy doing together which is rock climbing, but I don't have time! SIGHHH.

[[ChaosweaveR]]

Well, thank you. I appreciate the good words and compliments, and the thought too! It's just really frustrating when you honestly care about someone and to them you begin to feel like an object. I'm beginning to think that I need some time to just be by myself and not have to worry about a significant other-- I haven't had that in a long time (the break between Mark (oops, sorry lol) and Nate wasn't very long) and I feel I could really benefit from it. Stress and life have been getting to me and I don't really think the additional stress of a (slightly dysfunctional) relationship is very beneficial! I would like stress-free existence for awhile, kthxbai.

/rant

PS, my cat is attacking the bottom of my dresser... wtf.

I've been in that situation before, when you feel like you've become an object and/or source of money and transportation...it's a sucky feeling. I wish you well, you always have us to talk to if you ever need somebody. I always enjoy helping others.

As for your cat, sounds like a cat nip acid trip.

[valid]

' date='Nov 28 2010, 10:34 AM' post='42381']

I've been in that situation before, when you feel like you've become an object and/or source of money and transportation...it's a sucky feeling. I wish you well, you always have us to talk to if you ever need somebody. I always enjoy helping others.

As for your cat, sounds like a cat nip acid trip.

She is! I think she's missing a few brain cells so it goes to her head a lot faster.

Thanks to you Chris, and everyone else for listening! I appreciate that I can talk about this to you guys. It's also nice that no one here knows him so I can talk all I want and not have to worry, haha.

[[ChaosweaveR]]

Of course!

Also, if he ever does find the site, and sign up to spy on you, you can count on Joe and Jimmy to track him down, and banperstand his ass.

Trust me, I know they can. *wink wink nudge nudge*

[Ghost]

...You accuse me of only spending time with Mark...

I SWEAR I DIDN'T KNOW!!!!

and the FP drama increases.

[valid]

Oh no, not drama! :runs quickly away:

[Ghost]

have i been out of the loop for that long? seriously! what the hell is going on? do i need to get into it? i read it before but i was like 'no it cant be'.

'Highway 101 Shooting Kills One Man'

well i say to you, my fallen friend...RIP.

[Ghost]

damn kids! STOP vandalising vehicles! if i find you i will destroy you. have a nice day.

[Jedi3]

damn kids! STOP vandalising vehicles! if i find you i will destroy you. have a nice day.

who's car???

[markpetersonii]

who's car???

[Ringo64]

what happened Ghost!!!!!!

[Ghost]

sometime during the night and early morning, someone decided to go on a writing spree. they wrote all over the windows. they got like a dozen of vehicles on the street and one of them being my parents van. so it wasnt as bad as damaged vandalism, but still. and like two weeks ago someone tagged the Explorer windows.

[star_deceiver]

That's nothing a good beating/ass kicking won't solve!!!

[JJT*90]

That's nothing a good beating/ass kicking won't solve!!!

Or living in a state where it would be legal to shoot them.

[WoodburyMan]

Random person butting into random issue I prob don't know much about...however I cant even count how many advice threads Ive made in G6Performance over the years that are like this.. so maybe I picked something up...

Sadie seems like you need to have a talk with him. Let him decide if its worth it for him to keep this up. I'm going to play devil's advocate here for a bit so don't hate me for it lol. Assume he's the average guy. I know how this works as I was in a simular situation about four years ago now, on his end though. It was however at the end of high school, senior year, and my now ex was a junior. I was busy with applying to colleges, college visits, and I started a new job that was like was like 30 hours a week on top of school and a boatload of school activities I did. (A/V nerd, in charge of it and I had to be at every Wrestling match, Basketball game, etc to film it and do the PA system..on top of Plays and musicals..). So I was busy. My girl at the time did the A/V stuff with me but its different when we're working vs other time as we usually weren't anywhere near each other doing different things.

To make along story short, I felt like she wasn't spending any time with me, or making any attempt to see me or hang out with me. She kept hanging out with a bunch of her friends way more often than she did with me.. and it started to get very frustrating and I got very freaking pissed one time when she went on a trip to Washington DC with her best friend, then skiing in Vermont right over the weekend.. and she had already made plans with me for two of those days, one was a community service project with the local Lions Club that we liked to help out with with a few friends, another was a movie, release date for some movie we wanted to see and dinner after. She didn't even tell me she was going and breaking out plans till the day before one of them, and she was gone for a week. She went and saw the movie with her friend.. So I was pissed. Later during the breakup process she said she said she felt like hanging out with me was begining to be like a chore because we'd have to hang out when I'd be able to/want to.

Looking back on it four years later it's funny cause my perspective's changed. I should have realized what was going on, as I had no idea at the time, even though it was quite clear that we werent spending time together. (Pretty much how perseptive any guy is, we cant see shit lol). What ended up happening was she ended up literally telling me to come over after work one day when I was tired, and beat.. and just breaking it off right there. It was literally like ripping insides up into little tiny pieces and scattering them to the wind, as I did not see this coming at all or sense ANYTHING. (Again, normal guy ability to notice stuff wrong in a relationship is quite horrible). I felt like I was basically given a ultimatum and said here this is how it ends you have no say in it. That's what was the worst feeling. It literally took me 6 months till I even had a footing on what was going on. I lost like 30lbs in two months from not eating cause I was super depressed. (mind you I was 5'11" at the time, and 180lbs, so 150lb is VERY VERY slim.) . It prob took me at least a full 2 years after that to actually recover. Not even going to say full recovery cause that never happens. I was with her for 3 years all through high school and had $3,000 stashed and was planning on getting a ring as soon as she graduated a year after all this happened (4 years together). Very bad feeling.

However it got very better after 2 years mainly because I found out she cheated on me before I even started my new job and got busy. Then she started into drugs, and drinking, and she slept with about a dozen guys, cheating on her boyfriend she had after with all 12 of them lol. Then she got arrested for drugs, and now dropped out of school and is living in Colorado with a bunch of pot heads and drug addicts. That's beisdoes the point lol.

What you need to do is sit him down and talk to him. TELL HIM EXACTLY HOW YOU FEEL. Tell him EXACTLY what you think will happen if he keeps it up. Pound it into his head if you need to cause us guys have rock solid skulls that you need to blast through sometimes to get to us. You need to have him see what you see. Tell him flat out that its bothering you that you two never spend time together. Tell him its not fair to either of you if you guys keep having to keep this up and keep fighting because you two never see each other. Tell him it needs to be resolved.. and soon... either that or you two are going to keep drifting apart until you guys start to resent eachother... and thats no fun for anyone. Then give it a while. A few weeks, a few months, whatever feels right to you. If it improves, then GREAT! Hopefully you two will be happy together. However, if you don't see it improving, then you need to have another talk with him. You can give him another chance if you want, but you have to make him see that what you did try didn't work and youre BOTH still unhappy. Then hopefully, he will at least understand where you are coming at, and both of you can part on good terms and say さようなら, and hopefully he will get it and no one else will have to go through the torment I went through...

[Ghost]

wow dude, i think thats the biggest post you have made here.

[valid]

Wow, thanks for all the advice and help. I really appreciate it.

A lot of factors came together and after talking to him (rather, it felt like I was talking at him because he never responds to anything I say) and telling him exactly how I felt and everything that was going on in my head (scary I know) I broke it off. I wasn't getting anywhere after for over a span of at least two weeks I tried having a conversation in a multitude of ways. Now that we're broken up he doesn't act any differently, still distant and somewhat standoffish. However, when it did end, he said he had "been expecting it" since mid-November. Alright then.

I have learned a lot from this relationship, primarily: don't base a relationship solely on sex! It will not last! We tried to form something out of that and.. no. I think this will work out for the best, I know I'm happier anyway and I can only hope that he will be too. (Not that he would ever tell me. You are very right about MEN'S THICK SKULLS. :headdesk:)

[WoodburyMan]

wow dude, i think thats the biggest post you have made here.

Yea lol. You should see my early work on g6p. Almost everyone of my posts was like that. Wall of text. It got to the point where every post required cliffnotes LOL. Nod kidding either HAHA.

Wow, thanks for all the advice and help. I really appreciate it.

A lot of factors came together and after talking to him (rather, it felt like I was talking at him because he never responds to anything I say) and telling him exactly how I felt and everything that was going on in my head (scary I know) I broke it off. I wasn't getting anywhere after for over a span of at least two weeks I tried having a conversation in a multitude of ways. Now that we're broken up he doesn't act any differently, still distant and somewhat standoffish. However, when it did end, he said he had "been expecting it" since mid-November. Alright then.

I have learned a lot from this relationship, primarily: don't base a relationship solely on sex! It will not last! We tried to form something out of that and.. no. I think this will work out for the best, I know I'm happier anyway and I can only hope that he will be too. (Not that he would ever tell me. You are very right about MEN'S THICK SKULLS. :headdesk:)

Well at least he was expecting it and understood. As a clever GI Joe PSA once said.. Knowing is half the battle. As long as they have though somewhat in their head they will be fine and they will leave you alone... At least he wont get as fucked up as I did lol.

Man my ex there was a whore. What i talked about.. the guy she cheated on me was the guy she dated after me. He got what was coming to him when she slept with like a dozen guys when she got into her freshmen year of college lol. That always makes me laugh. And a bunch of friends she was hanging out with towards the end of when we were together I didnt like and I knew were into drugs and stuff.. I told her to avoid them, and she got pissed off at me. Then 2 years later arrested for drugs lol. Lost all her scholarships she had for it too.

[Ringo64]

Well don't know if I should say congrats or not Sadie but at least you can move on now

I do have to say when you are busy as hell, its hard to do stuff. Like all this year since I started my job, I've given up hanging out with my friends and basically said to a couple girls, I like you but can't do anything because I work 40 hours a week, go to school, etc... Only free time I had were Friday afternoons and sometimes I would even have to do hw then.

It's good to finally be on vacation for 2 weeks where I can hang out friends and do stuff

But if you're not happy in a relationship and you can't make it work then yes its best to just move on

[WoodburyMan]

God. Drama sucks. My Ex's Ex is messaging me on G6P about stuff that happened over 2 years ago. I want it to end. Jist of it she lied to both of us and pretty sure she was seeing both of us at the same time. I didnt know at the time, however they ended up getting engaged and they arent anymore and shes making up lies saying I knew she was with him, and to make it better shes sayign WHILE THEY WERE ENGAGED which I know is a complete lie.